some decisions yield little reward. sometimes the bad outweighs the good. the hurt overwhelms the healing. sometimes intentions are lost and irrationality tempts my necessity for survival. refined modes of thinking become quickly overturned by short term solutions. then, the ways that held me down to earth and away from ether floating, become just as airy and confused as their rejected counterparts. so, when things seem to be leading me off the path of presence and wholeness, what do i do? do i lean into parts of myself that have been left behind? do i hard pivot? do i stop everything and reassess? do i lean into false navigation and forgetfulness? do i continue to neglect my own needs?
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